Posts

Showing posts from October, 2023

First things first

Image
  I was talking with a client yesterday and they said to me that they were not sure what goals to set next, after a particularly trying episode of setting and maintaining boundaries.  I started to reflect on everything we had been through in therapy, and there was really only one suggestion I could make. I brought out Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs... and talked about how it might be helpful to look at whether basic needs were being met before moving on to others that were "nice-to-have." I likened it to building a house when there were holes in the foundation, and that it's more helpful to repair the holes before moving on. Free image "Pyramid" from Pixabay The concept Maslow talked about looked like a pyramid, with levels indicating the base (representing physical needs like food, sleep, shelter, etc.) all the way to the top (which represented complete fulfillment on every level). My client was familiar with this concept, as we'd discussed it before, and

Thanksgiving thoughts

Image
Most of my clients don't mention Thanksgiving; it's an excuse to have a long weekend and they only talk about it after it has happened and only if it was stressful for them. Their stressors mostly and usually centre around Christmas, Easter, Valentines Day, Mothers Day and Fathers Day. Royalty-free photo from Pixabay To me, Thanksgiving (in the US, Columbus Day) is bittersweet. In 2013, while my youngest was still alive, and homeless in her car in Edmonton Alberta, I was so discouraged and was thinking of cancelling the big meal. She got wind of it, and pleaded with me: "Oh Mom, don't cancel Thanksgiving. Look at me; I'm living in my car but I'm still thankful. I'm thankful that I have you and Dad, and my friends who love me, and a place to sleep at night. Please Mom. Please." So, touched and moved by her concern for ME, I did Thanksgiving traditions that year. Less than 2 weeks later, she was gone. So yeah, bittersweet. I still celebrate